Jamie's Blog

Sunday, May 12, 2013

A Dear Friend Died Yesterday

A dear friend died yesterday. 
We went to say our last goodbyes and I-Love-You’s
But he did not wait.
It was okay
Because we had not waited until the last minute
Thinking we had tomorrow for those words
We always wanted to say
Meant to say

But never found the right moment for
While we had him with us
Sometimes only inches away
Last words floating into forever.

Having the last word means, “I won, you lost,”
When we think we have tomorrow.
But when tomorrow is lost
We think back to the last time we met
To what we said, with sorrow
Sometimes regret.

Had we known, we never would have said
Or left things unsaid.
If only we had known!

But all we know is that we do not have tomorrow
And we know that
bitter and sweet
Words last.


  1. I lost a dear friend yesterday and did not get to say goodbye. She was my neighbor for 14 years. The kind that I could use my key and get an egg when she was working. I hadn't seen her in a while and was on my way to her home when I got the news. I miss her but am relieved for her that she is free from this dreaded disease. What words could have been said will never be known..Thanks for letting me say goodbye here.


    1. I am so glad that my words helped you say your goodbye. I wrote this poem for myself: actually, it poured out of me in the hours after he died.
      I posted the poem in hopes that it would mean something to others. We are both blessed.

  2. beautiful tribute to a friend xxx

  3. Hi Jamie,

    This is so incredibly poignant and touching. It's also a powerful reminder to not wait to say "those words," whatever they might be.

    "But all we know is that we do not have tomorrow," such meaningful words for me.

    When my mother died, I wasn't able to be present at the moment she took her last breath. Knowing I had not left anything unsaid was, and still is so comforting.

    I'm so sorry for your loss, Jamie. Thank you for sharing this.

    1. Nancy, I admire your writing very much, so your appreciation of my poem is high praise.
      More important, however, is that it touched your heart. I am glad.

  4. Nice poem. Sorry for the loss, but I am quite familiar and it is a part of this human life. Is is anyone I know? Anyways, I hope you had some element of being able to feel that you had a kind goodbye--even though you can never be prepared, I guess. Well. Much love to you. Thanks for being vulnerable. --PD

  5. Very good poem. I know that feeling as I had it happen to us when my father in law was sick. We didn't get there in time.

    I appreciate your giving back after two diagnoses. I am a three time survivor of two types of cancer, also lost my Mom and Dad to cancer. I give back by speaking for the American Cancer Society as a Hero Of Hope, and I work with a website that offers online support and a way that cancer patients, survivors and caregivers can connect.

    Keep up the good work!

    1. Dear Greg
      I am horrified to see that I missed your comment until today. Please accept my apology and know that I deeply appreciate your kind thoughts. Blessings from one survivor to another!

  6. dear jamie,

    i am so sorry for your loss. your poem is so poignantly beautiful and touching; and i do think it will help others consider what words they may wish to say before it is too late. as a hospice nurse, i witnessed many of these scenarios, and always tried to offer reassurance that whatever the cicumstance of the dying person was, all was as it was meant to be at the time of their death. often, it was helpful just to spend a few moments of quiet time to listen to their regrets, to offer support and empathy and to let the grieving person sit by the bedside, hold the persons hand and tell them what they wished they would have had time to say. it seemed to ease their minds and hearts and make those regrets less painful because they recieved support that recognized their pain, and re-inforced the simple fact that we cannot always predict when death will occur. i hope the poem you wrote has eased your heart some - the fact that it all came pouring out after your friend died may have been a way to self-comfort, a good skill to have.

    love, XOXO,


    1. I humbly apologize for the delay in replying. I do appreciate your kind thoughts, and thank you for taking the time to share them with me.